My Friend Ted

Pastor’s Epistle—February, A.D. 2015 B

February is a time for family.

Indeed, Christian tradition sets aside this entire month for the contemplation of God’s Incarnation in the Holy Family of Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. We kick things off on February 2nd with a holiday that goes by many names, “Candlemas” being the one I much prefer. Candlemas is the day that Mary and Joseph presented the Christchild, then 40 days old, at the Temple in Jerusalem. There He was welcomed and celebrated by the aged prophets Simeon and Anna, who doted on Him like loving grandparents and announced Jesus as the Light of the world.

Halfway through this month we arrive at St. Valentine’s Day, for which February is most obviously famous. Valentine’s Day has to do with romance, marriage, and, yes, sex—without which our families, and indeed life itself, would be quite impossible. Trouble comes when we try to separate sex from romance and marriage. But I think we can all agree that Valentine’s Day, and the intimacy which it celebrates, are very good things. Of course, marriage tends to produce offspring, which are also associated with February; this month, halfway between the winter solstice and the spring equinox, is when many farm animals start to lactate and lamb. So we’re back to family again.

But family is spiritual as well as fleshly. I was reminded of this during the last weekend in January, when my old friend Ted came to visit. Ted (Fedor, really) is an interesting fellow who features as a frequent character in my college and seminary stories. We met during a chemistry lab and got to know each other in the weight room. We were both pre-med: whereas I went on to ministry, he became a brain surgeon working in New York and San Francisco. Having moved to the States from Moscow at the tender age of 13, he is an accomplished world traveler, whose stories and photographs prove far more interesting than mine. More importantly, however, he’s also one of the kindest and most genuine human beings I’ve ever met.

Ted was only able to spend one evening with us, having to leave by noon the next day, but with the exception of a 20-minute encounter during a very brief layover in New York, this was the first time we’d been able to spend together in some seven years. The last time we saw Ted, we only had one kid, and he was but an infant. Now he’s in second grade with a pair of sisters to boot. It is a good thing to have friends, even if you only get to see them once every seven years. He’s Uncle Ted now, having become in a single night a hero to all three of our children. За нашу дружбу.

Distance is a hard thing, especially when we are separated from those who mean the most to us. But it also helps us sift out what’s truly important in life. It reminds us that possessions, careers, even nations will pass away—but the souls whom we love have an eternal destiny. Love, truly, never dies. And love is what makes of us a family. Frustrations, poor communication, and exhaustion also make a family. But mostly love.

This February, let us celebrate our children. Let us romance our spouses. Let us remind old friends just how indispensable they are. After all, God Himself is a family, the Holy Three-in-One. How then can we expect to live without ours?